Ahhh, Pinterest. So many pretty things. So much perfection. Just don’t look too closely at real life afterwards as it will only be a disappointment.
Still, yesterday was a grey, spendthrift Saturday, so Pinterest was an easy way to while away the hours. I stumbled upon Hush’s ideas for the perfect Sunday. It certainly looked very enticing. Could it possibly be remotely achievable? Could I have a Pinterest Sunday in real-life? Let’s see?
1) A long lie-in, swaddled in crisp sheets.
Not a great start, to be honest. Crisp sheets would require changing the bedding. The clean set, I think, is lurking somewhere in the ironing pile. Not gonna happen.
Besides which, I was up at 7.40am (having managed to convince Noodles to go back to sleep at 5.39am…by sleeping with him in his bed). I was grumpy enough at Husband yet again nabbing the lie-in. Had he been doing so in crisp sheets I’d have had to have used them to wrap his body in as I buried him in the garden.
2) Breakfast in bed.
The trouble with breakfast in bed is that someone has to get up to get it. Thus, Boo and Noodles got breakfast in my bed. I got a piece of toast on the hop.
Still, imagine if I had changed the sheets and then got crumbs in them! Perfection is hard work.
3) Lazily reading the Sunday papers.
I still haven’t read Saturday’s papers. I know my dad bought a paper today – I took it up to Husband in bed (because sometimes I act nicer than I feel) and I saw him reading it.
I tried to catch up with Saturday’s ‘news’ this afternoon. Every time I picked a section up Noodles crashed through it. Now, unless I fancy doing a broadsheet jigsaw, Saturday’s features will remain a mystery to me.
However, it has given me a plan. Next time I’m going to feign interest in the Sport section first. Noodles can get busy doing his best puppy impression with that and whilst he’s occupied ripping it to shreds I can sneakily read the rest. No one’s going to miss Sport, are they?
It was definitely sunny at 7.40am. After getting up and showered, changing Noodles and feeding the small mouths, as it was evident that no one else was in the mood to go anywhere fast, I decided to wash the car in the sunshine. (The dust cloud from the Sahara had taken its toll and it was covered in a layer of dust, along with the grime still evident from our near-miss with the swamp people.) As I need to be able to see out, but keep forgetting to buy new windscreen wiper blades, I thought it best to get buffing, all optimistic that we would venture out en famille later on.
By the time I’d finished the clouds had gathered. Bugger.
(But at least the car is shiny.)
5) A walk in the countryside.
I knew this didn’t stand the remotest chance of happening as soon as Husband announced at 12.30 that he was ‘just nipping into town’.
‘Oh, I was about to go to Sainsbury’s,’ I lamented.
I knew that food would have to be gathered before going out and that we would have to be back by 4.00 to get on with dinner. The day was slipping away.
‘I’ll only be quick. I don’t actually need to buy anything anyway. I’m just looking,’ Husband reassured.
Famous last words.
He came back 2 hours later. Game over.
Noodles and Boo just wanted to watch CBeebies anyway. What they don’t know is that I might have failed today, but I intend to force them out tomorrow. Now watch that bite me on the bum.
6) Pottering in the garden.
I know nothing about gardening. I leave it all to my dad. Besides which, the main focus of our garden is the scruffy bit of grass covered in plastic toys and still acting as a badminton court. Still, it didn’t stop Noodles from running in and out as though on a piece of bungee elastic all afternoon, whilst Boo dug a hole in the borders for no particular reason other than she was pretending to be at gardening club. The compost gained itself some new worms. I can’t handle worms.
7) A perfect Sunday roast.
‘Aw, not a roast again,’ Husband moaned as I unpacked the chicken. The urge hit me to ram the carcass onto his head.
A Sunday roast is the one time of the week when we all sit around the table together. It’s also the one time of the week when I’m not acting like some short-order chef to the faddy eaters of the family. Besides, what’s not to like when it comes to a roast dinner? Although I am on end-of-the-month finances, so no goose-fat roast potatoes and no parsnips full-stop.
Then Boo falls over on the way to the table, Noodles doesn’t want to eat and Grandy grumbles.
Did I aim for ‘perfect’? Now, there’s a mistake.
8) An evening curled up on the sofa with a box-set and a bottle of red.
Make that ‘An evening squishing the cuddly toys on Boo’s futon whilst watching Aladdin.’
I’m too done-in to be looking out for a box-set to get addicted to on Netflix. And since my misadventures with the Rioja and house red (scan down to #7 on my near-death moments) I’m not that great a fan of red wine anyway. I’d make it a cocoa instead, but Husband is already in bed and as the house in the dark is freaking me out at the moment I think I’ll stay upstairs thanks.
Ah, so my Pinterest Sunday was pretty much a bust. Still, the car is shiny, the woods will still be there tomorrow and I had some good tickly fun with Noodles earlier. And you can’t beat a bit of Disney to round off the day. It may not have been Pinterest perfect, but it was still pretty good. Although I swear I’ll get a lie-in one of these days.