Hooray for Bollywood and Brownies…

..Plus An Unfortunate Incident on the Stairs.


Sometimes, my mouth and a tendency for saying ‘yes’ leads me into all sorts of situations. A friend’s mum is high enough up in the guiding association that she’s had tea with the Queen more than once. And it was in whose company I found myself offering my dance services for an internationally-themed Thinking Day.

It didn’t quite work out like that though. Instead I found myself in a field along with around 200 Brownies, teaching them how to shake it like a Bollywood diva in order to celebrate their 100th birthday.


As I’ve said before, I was never a Brownie. But although they’re still very good at picking their shit up and being very lovely, it’s also very different to what it would (should) have been my day: bouncy castles, archery, circus skills and a damn great climbing wall. I don’t remember my sister (who was a Brownie, in yet another act of sibling unfairness) doing any of that. And there I was, about to teach them to dance.


Although I used to teach dance to little people it’d been over a year since my last class. I’ve become a lot less fit over that time and faced taking six half-hour workshops over the course of the afternoon. In the blazing sun. And my actual Bollywood training has only ever amounted to one hour-long workshop at Move It back in 2011, plus a fair amount of time watching YouTube videos. I might have a gorgeous outfit that I bought off the internet, but I’ve never been to India. Oh, and, in my usual 11th hour way I’d only choreographed my routine at 7 o’clock this morning. All in all, GULP!

I rushed so fast through my first workshop that I finished after only 19 minutes of the half hour. Whoops. And it felt that I was facing the entire cast of Slumdog Millionaire.


A sea of expectant faces before me (although probably only about 30)…now, WHAT WAS THE NEXT MOVE AGAIN?!?!

But as the afternoon wore on I found my groove. I had the 30 minute thing down pat and I was getting great comments. Brownie leaders saying that even the kids who don’t normally join in were engaged, more leaders asking if I ran classes, both kids ones and adult ones, girls saying it’s been their favourite session (great considering the stiff competition to be had from the climbing wall and Loomz braiding).

Loomz. The elastic band braiding phenomenon obsessing young girls and infuriating* mums everywhere. (*Because there’s no joy in clearing up hundreds of overly-priced elastic bands every night.)

But best was the reaction from one girl who, when I asked if they all liked dancing, gave a very blunt ‘No.’ But at the very end, as the Brownies were preparing for their well-deserved cook-out and I was heading off, she came running up to me: ‘Bollywood dancing is the BEST THING EVER!!!’

Me: 😆

It looks like I’ll be doing more too. I already have two guide units interested. Yay!

* * * * *
Unfortunately though pride really does come before a fall. Quite literally in my case.

Straight from the Brownie thing I dashed round to the neighbours’ for their annual absolutely-hip-and-amazing barbecue. Highlight of every year. I didn’t want to miss out on a sausage, Plus Husband had failed to listen again and had expected me home hours earlier.


My haste was unfortunate though, as I really could have done with changing out of my slippy-on-hard-surfaces shoes.

When Noodles decided to take a wander around the neighbours’ house. I followed. No pity there – it gave me a chance to have a nose at their gorgeous decor. But coming back down was tricky. Their stairs have been beautifully renovated, but are all wood, ie slippery beyond fuck.


Noodles is still a little unsteady on stairs, so in my wisdom I picked him up. Two steps later my slippy-on-hard-surfaces shoe did its thing and slipped from under me. Keeping tight hold of both Noodles and my phone (because priorities, right?) I used my right elbow to slow my tumble, just at the hosts and their family waved people off at the door. I hadn’t even had a drink! Maybe that was the problem.

Personally I thought I did a very good job of not crying, because my GOD did it hurt! But Noodles was unscathed and actually not bothered, so it could have been worse.

Now back home (and still very much sober) my arm still hurts, worryingly, in the same way it did when I broke it in 1986 (World Cup Summers are not kind to me in more ways than one). Plus, along with the graze there seems to be a lump that’s not my funny bone.


With Boo having a dress rehearsal for her ballet exam tomorrow afternoon, I could do without a trip to A&E. Let alone having to spend any of the summer spent in some form of ugly bandaging.

Here’s keeping my fingers crossed that it’s just a bruise. And there I was thinking that I’d just hurt tomorrow from my Bollywood exertions today.


If only.


21 thoughts on “Hooray for Bollywood and Brownies…”

    1. I LOVE Bride and Prejudice. Funny and clever with singing and dancing. What more could you want?! Bollywood Dreams was one of my favourite musicals that I’ve seen on stage too. I’ve definitely got a heart that beats to Bhangra beat.

    2. As for my elbow, it’s still very sore this morning (as is my shoulder, but I don’t know if I wrenched it coming down the stairs, or if it’s from over-enthusiasm dancing). I suppose I should go and get it checked out. But I’ll have to be naughty and wait til after Boo’s ballet rehearsal. :-/

  1. Oh my. I really hope that looks better there than it does here. Am so sorry for you. You’re having my kind of day over there. But am really glad you rediscovered your groove! Perhaps on your trip to A&E you could offer a dance class for the staff if they let you line jump?

    1. I managed to sleep well enough last night considering it’s sore and the room was really muggy AND Noodles decided he was ONLY going to sleep on my side of the bed. (I actually had a dream that my car was seized by the police for not being insured and that I got home to find Husband had left me. Swings and roundabouts I suppose.) But my fingers feel a bit tingly, which I suspect isn’t a good thing. NHS Direct has advised me to go to A&E immediately. :-/ But as there are a bazillion reasons I don’t want to spend the summer holidays in plaster – Boo’s birthday, having to do her hair for her ballet exam, swimming, the Race for Life, being able to DO stuff – I figure I may as well wait til I’ve sorted Boo out for her dress rehearsal.
      Oh bugger my slippy shoes.

      1. Totally understand a bazillion reasons but……you know you are the gluestick in this family……you have to take care of you….tingly fingers is scary stuff there. Toss out the slippy shoes and get thee to A&E. One half summer is not worth aggravating this!

      2. Luckily the tingly fingers were less concerning than they could have been. I should have fully functioning arms again in a couple of days. Thank God, as Husband is not cut out for domestic service, let alone childcare and care work.

      3. Yes, I had wondered what in the world would happen to the gluesticks if you went down with an injury……was going to suggest rations of SPAM as the lesser of the evils between that and your husband trying to cook! So have you been to A&E?

    2. Funnily enough the body parts I expected to hurt today from dancing so much don’t. So at least there’s that. Bollywood is definitely kind to me, even if wooden stairs aren’t.

  2. I had to rush over to see what you were meaning by the mention of your arm in the comment on my blog just now. Ouch! Okay, Is it awful of me to switch now from compassion/empathy to jealousy/envy? How do you look like that????? I thought that was a photo of one of your teen daughters. Honestly. Alrighty then, passing thru both compassion & jealousy now and moving onto comments pertaining to writing. I love how you seamlessly always manage to meld several topics into one cohesive blog, unlike those of us who shove things into a list, trying to umbrella them under one unifying title.

    1. Oh no, I love a list (and unless I’ve lost feeling in my fingers by then) have one planned for tonight. Although it won’t be as good as any of yours ever are. Always in awe of your writing.

  3. …And I wasn’t quite finished, thank you to my own fat fingers which touched “post” on my cell accidentally. Anyhow, I adored how you worked hubby’s text in here along with the F word but I have to say–noticeably absent was the cute way you always use the word, “whilest”

  4. Oh for goodness sakes….sorry! New phone. Alright, I don’t think I have ever mentioned how much I get a kick out of you incorporating that word, but it’s tickled me for a while now. Okay, lastly–this was another highly entertains post from you, Heal quickly and now where is that f-ing “post” button??

    1. I could do with a new phone (it’s memory capacity is only a tad better than my own and is fit to burst). But I’m not sure I have the energy to learn a new operating system.
      All future whilsts will be with you in mind. Xx

  5. You have now reached superstar status in my book. I’ve been to those Brownie jamboree-type things before, and anyone willing to lead that many crazy girls in anything wins my undying admiration. I bet they absolutely loved you! -Amy

    1. Haha! I hope they enjoyed it as much as I did. I had a blast! All of the feedback was great and has filtered all over the place.
      The fact that the Loomz-braiding was possibly THE most popular activity kept me grounded though. You can’t beat a fad, no matter how pretty your costume. An important life lesson there I think. 😉

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